Research
Communication between the divorced couple constitutes the main factor that determines whether a divorce is “good” or not, but it is not the only one. For instance, the level of conflict between divorced parents and the level of change in their children’s life could also determine how well a child would adjust to the divorce. Other factors to be taken into consideration involve the larger family system, such as communication among family members, and social support from extended family members.
On the other hand, problems that children might experience after their parents divorce could involve academic problems such skipping class, being expelled from school or repeating a grade, or other behavioral and emotional problems that can affect their psychological functioning. However, research shows that suitable communication among parents constitutes a protective factor, as it can foster healthier psychological adjustment in children.
To the divorced parents out there: Do you recognize yourself in one of the four groups? Whether you belong to the first two groups, or the other two, you are now aware of how your arrangement with your ex-partner could affect your child’s wellbeing. A good divorce will allow your child to benefit from a reduced range of negative effects that can accompany divorce. While it might not be easy to adopt co-parenting behaviors with a person you do not necessarily get along with, try to remember the one thing connecting you two, your child.
References
Ahrons, C. (1994). The good divorce: Keeping your family together when your marriage comes apart. New York: HarperCollins.
Amato, P. R., Kane, J. B., & James, S. (2011). Reconsidering the “Good Divorce”. Family Relations, 60, 511-524. DOI:10.1111/j.1741-3729.2011.00666.x